It may come again36-40)
Author: Arrange:
36th Zhang
Speak:
Process these days is busy, adjust company's group finally well. The person of cooperative company's person and our company weaves together, on post, make adjustment again. However, one day, stone army asks for leave suddenly with me to go home. Person has left , I just see in postbox, ask for leave to strip. Ask for leave strip writes so:
Grandson
Sorry! When you see this mail, I have left company, there is a matter handling of urgent need in home, it is very busy to see you for this few days, so, can only leave without saying good-bye. This mail right does leave permit, hope that you are authorized.
Attach a story:
One
Stone is asked: " my wife that should seek
Buddha has ridiculed smile: " the answer of problem actually when yourself heart base. For these years, can let you like hovering between life and death , can let you can feel life to substantiate , it is gone to constantly forward that leting you straight take chest, are you the person that you like? Do you love your person still? "
Stone is also ridiculed: " however
Buddha says: " real if such words, your a lifetime will can be incompetent since then. You go to perfect self constantly in the process that is habit in pursuit love. If you do not go to chase the person that a self likes , the step of your self-improvement also stagnates. "
Stone has snatched the words. .." Buddha says: " because of her is the person that you most like , let her live happy and happiness quilt you regard to do is biggest and happy in a lifetime. So, you can still live for her more happy and are happy and unceasing with great efforts. Happiness and happiness have no limit, so, your effort will also have no limit , will not absolutely stop. "
Stone says: " that I
Buddha says: " so many
Stone has shaken
2
Stone:" as is so, are you to want
Buddha has shaken to shake
One takes off stone
Buddha says:
Stone says: " my requirement for love comparison harshness, that is: I do not think here surface mixes with sympathy to mix with pity, I ask her to come from heart to love me. Sympathetic pity is tolerant and tolerates although is also a kind of love, though also bring the happiness on some meaning to person, it is that I hate bitterly. If she for me love mix with these, so I would rather she does not pay attention to me, or direct refusal my love Yi, it is at the time that I am still in time to quit. I feel that it is deep that feelings can only get stuck the more, despair far than hope that is true as coming somewhat, because desperate pain is a x that, and the pain of hope is indefinite. "
Buddha smile: " is
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3
Stone is asked: " why others love a girl, she is most beautiful
Buddha asks: " you dare affirm that
Stone says without
Buddha says: " congratulation.
Stone some are
Buddha again says continuously: " she not is beautiful between this lifetime, it is even at the time that you so love her , you know this fact clearly. But you so love her still, because of you love is not only her youth is beautiful and beautiful , will know Shao China is easy to pass , red face is easy , is old, but you for her love have surmounted the thing of these surfaces, have also surmounted years. What you like is her entire person , is her unique heart mainly. "
Stone can't help to say: " yes! It
Buddha has ridiculed smile ":
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4
Stone is asked: " why afterwards together time,
Buddha says: " that is because of
Stone has felt
Buddha says continuously: " when the time that love has gone to certain degree , is meeting when in do not know do not feel transform feelings into to kiss , you can regard she as the part in your life gradually, such you will many some tolerances and forgivenesses, also only kissing feelings just is you since birth beginning Heaven arranges , it is also that you have no choice, so you afterwards do, can only meet you kiss feelings, no matter you are born , are so noble, you want to not speak any condition land accept them, accomplish to take the responsibility for them , for them is good. "
Stone has wanted to think
Buddha has ridiculed smile: " love begins because of appreciating mutually, because excited appearance love , because cannot depart from mutually and marry. But more important point has tolerant needs , forgiveness, habit and adaptation just meeting hand in hand a lifetime. "
Stone silence: " original
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5
Stone is asked: " in such a times in, such a society,
Buddha says:
Stone has wanted
It is a burst that Buddha has also been silent
Stone length Xu one breath, Buddha knows
Story is spoken. Wish
37th Zhang Dismiss
Speak:
Mother! Why will stone army be so? I
Say that really, if be not the contact"It", this may be concerning his age. Perhaps, it is his built-in heart, he grows up just like refusal , refuses deep thinking , refuses to stand independently in society. So that in 30 few years he besides, have the characteristic of the well-behaved child of elephant mother vision except picture, nearly, can not resist the social storm been faced with by adult circle. Though, he may live independently , can solve the problem of board and lodging by oneself, but psychology goes up , I have not expected him is such is fragile and cannot bear to attack. Perhaps, he this wants to use noble-minded come to cover up self helplessness. From him, come to company, I regard him as the bosom friend on own soul. Under the condition of having not verified , think blindly that he will be little partner , let him make general manager assistant. At first, I ask strictly for himPurpose is to want to let him takeEven if can't reachWill also think
HoweverHe pictureThe matter ofBesides, my personalI tirednessAnd he can not beMy tone doesFormer daysHe do notBut I hope still sincerelyMy tight requirementHe nearly thinks. I am helpless, I for generation ditch problem has got more deep understanding from this. I know that that is not only because age problem is returned because of the together natural protective screen built on experience. No matter we how to overcome the divergence of each other with great efforts on feelings, in fact, what we can not exceed is of each other for the social barrier for the attitude of life to drift apart to can imagine. Though we are this kind of barriers is painful, can not close , because this is not to compromise the problem that may be thoroughly changed and stoped.
Have calculated
As a result in 3th day,
Grandson
In time that passes, feel that it is cooked to be not enough to become by oneself. Think by 3, I have got new realization. Say psychological words, since a period, I understand for you , but am not to identify very much , include our intercourse. My heart is thinking of what , you will not understand. Thank that you give my concern, you can also feel my repayment in the future. Is , had better not go to study carefully, because of everything let when in not speech.
Believe that happiness belongs to you, everything that this happiness should come from in yourself struggle and that yourself gives yourself as a result is just most actual. You not need the appraisement of others completely , are the best proof as a result.
As to me, I have found own life coordinate , and can perfect it with great efforts. No matter the chance of life how to, I am perplexed. Only believe with great efforts that God is fair. When this, please rest assured.
I want to explain that I am still young, I need to like , need to pass the life of normal person , from traditional meaning, should have for parents to deliver to stay. Since this time, the matter that occurs is too many, know do not know , it is clear and not clear , intersects together, my mood becomes complex slowly , it is deepened the more that I know by oneself for me, also have the more a kind of say that the thing of not last taste is smashing my drum heart.
This time, come to Tianjin, do not know why, miss home especially, that is I former never have the feeling of error. Perhaps I real picture all say is so old, I also must very earnest have explanation for self. I feel that what I now most lack is a kind of sense of responsibility, I have no. Possibility is since family pressure is too little, self also not enough has no to own pressure those survival crisis that you say. Is seems necessary to give self proper pressurization , however, you do not misunderstand my meaning, what I point is that in the aspect of my personal life. Go home feeling is really good! Today, have seen surface with a girlThe feeling of each other is good. I
The matter on work, what let me be disappointed slightly is that you also do not know me so. I think , I have not planed to beginning to end long-term when the working meaning of Tianjin. All matter considers since startinging point , my is based on the relation between us. Far from being cooperate certainly, rely on me, foundation does not match current weight and the problem that you talk about what cooperation. My departure, is that one frees oneself for you. This problem I have considered for a long time. If you can be good , have also reached my original intention. I am not a very great person, my is a very simple personSimple I let you feel complex existence. When this, please forgive! I can not some words describe is too thorough, that is inconsistent with my personality. Actually, it is clear that I am nearly impossible to also say , but I can treasure surely, if you have doubt for this, that proves that you have problem.
Just now I have said, what I most lack is sense of responsibility, but lack not say have no meaning. From bone son, say that I have responsibility and conscience still. So, for any person, I do not speak easily promise. Perhaps, I can therefore pay out cost , lose opportunity, but I have a clear conscience. After being this, doing not need at the premier time to you explain what regardless of the explanation that needs or needs not. Everything has passed , I feel that tired word will be written again , seek new local weight to write.
I am not to say it is my tired heart to have dealings with you. I meaning is to say , hope you consideration whether may when my hometown in company's office again do get up , and I can only cooperate with your individual. If can not, I think that I am nearly impossible to be qualified for former work. Write first that is this.
Wish! Stone
Have read this letter, I understand to realize without mistake that I will signify end with the holding together of stone army in work, unless he with a kind of new attitude, a private parts that change perhaps. At this moment, can I say what? When regreting , I can not restrain the idea disdained for him. He is one can not drive Yu the person of the livelihood of one of us, too much emphasis is objective, this has no meaning. My heart road mileage tells me, personal strength is insignificant, it is realistic respect to borrow the ability of force and the reliable guarantee of development. He as can't do this point, my nature can not also help him, even if having helped him today, tomorrow, he can still put forward new requirement. I not ask the person under me every one hears me words, self has no the person of definite view, but I think that I now still belong to the dozen stages of rivers and mountains, his this has clearly to borrow to think of the well-known meaning of home that asks me to reconsider his role.
I like will. I know that 1000 armies are easy, one asks for disaster. Flat heart is discussed , I really hope that he can block alone, step my rear dust, the work of alleviating me is borne. However, the work of 3 years is exchanged , he can not understand my all purposes still, he no institute with skill and ease technical ability. This is not quality problem , but is to originate from heart. So, can I still say what? After all, person has will each. Hope him can everything is smooth, may all your wish come true.
I decide to have a meeting in company, is trying to announce that dismiss him. He puts forward independence to build point , puts aside company and my individual to cooperate , this is impossible. He thinks of matter too simple , or say that is clever and clever beyond the limit. This is principle problem, I will not promise that am also impossible to reply. If I reply , will not face present work, not is worth for. This explains that he does not know me still , does not know my heart will. I how to change own strategy and the opportunity of extending probably at will for own heart. He has estimated self too high , has estimated personal feelings feelings in the role in business sea high, dismissing him is let him know ways of the world is hot and cold, I have hit report resolutely to personnel department.
When the adoption of the Ministry of Personnel my opinion, after everything becomes fact, I nearly can not speech states the pain of heart. For private feelings, I can not a little accept him to leave company this reality, and it is what I must do to dismiss his decision. I know that he will not understand , can even send a cup of wine Shi the sigh of military power, but I do not want to explain what. Market not is food market may bargain. To be the palm door person of company, it must be unselfish , this is concerned with the management of company. I have approved such a word very much: Law is past outcome, feelings are future outcomes, reason is current outcome. Claiming the essence of the human-based management of enterprise is rational person doctrine management, ripple instead of the beauty of favor and law strip. Business sea is ruthless , but is to have made strategy and the heart wisdom of a person because this one is practiced ruthlessly. If speaking favor taste everywhere, with heart, change heart, is impossible Bo attack business sea , in decide the victory 1000. Market gets victory , do not rely on conscience and pains alone , decide heart, need to rely on wit more. I have been so easy and credulous and boost self, is frank, however, business sea Bo attack , stress more in the comprehensibility of a person for business and the assurance for opportunity , even stint no effort empty feelings insincerity in competing , song Yi Feng go to meet , its last purpose is to send system in person.
This matter comes out , the colleague of around is seeing me with the sight looked closely at , I must work with great efforts , cannot treat lightly again. I think , it is displayed that strategy can get in such environment and sublimation. Life church I do not readily believe any person, must rely on own effort , learn the viewpoint of confirmation others. Correctness plays on this foundation, is equal to have washed the cerebrum of others. Not correct nature is removed , also is equal to have studied a knowledge.
I socialize very repeated, it is steady that rivers and mountains sinks. When socialize at the same time, must let company fast develop , accomplishment can most explain problem. Market is not as battle-field that is to explain that business sea is cruel, the rule of market as the road of military commander, grandson art of war is motto.
I and stone army have the divergence of heart will and the acting ditch of age after all, he can not understand me is deep and free and easy, I can not also understand his petty trick and since love. This kind of psychology confront each other is nearly not adjustable and, give up talent only to preserve. Though he when my side, I am fastidious for his work , and have lost him, obvious feeling has lacked what. Though I in sense of loss some can not recover , but I will not change idea.
Stone army can hate me surely , is certain, his meeting is sad , is as me. But I believe what we will not make excuses to opposite side , with our understanding of each other. The cruelty on business site may make all natural self flood in realistic needs, resemble inning chess. Right now, I have only Zhu Ge to light to wipe away tears chop horse Su feeling. But it has not been dripping wet to accompany around.
38th Zhang
Speak:
He calls Liu Wei , is seemingly a person of the most100The saying of the RMB of 10 thousand I am always filled with to feel uncertain. It is not that I not need this money , but is that I do not understand his purpose. He is the friend of one of my friend , knows in one business social engagement. In that day, one of my friend stands treat , says in telephone that asks all to eat potluck, it may cooperate to develop if seeing incidentally have what business.
I have gone! Sit on banquet, somebody points< xml:namespace prefix=st1 ns="urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags"/>< personname productid=鎴愯€?w:st=on>It< personname/>Wife still calls me Miss. Scaning widely hope that a bearing is free and easy, stature gets fat slightly but not too fat man station is in front of me , he words are few, on face, hang gentle and peaceful smile throughout, side goes up is a group of friends are scoffing.
" have wine! It is
Have not been wrong! He keeps throughout sober drink wine demeanour, I observe him wantonly secretly. I am dark to sigh , am competitor. Sit face to face with him , discover that his problem is in eye completely , his sight is very good at adjusting control. It is not overcautious to meet the first time, say very always. I discover that it is sharp that he gazes at my sight, is me to use same sight to it as regard , he evades , but is not to dodge fast. This explanation he has a kind of self-confidence for woman. I can feel that he is interested in me. This kind of interest is not so obvious and move restlessly , it is seems the past master of towns and villages all over the country.
" may ask a problem? " he says suddenly for me, judge that brings to trial on court when make managing tactics diligently ask defendant. Though, tone is mild , courtesy very. I smile approval, also is very, very sight throw to him.
" have what matter needs I help does?
" now has no!
" I like to find pleasure to help others! My mottoEven have
" thanks! I miss me if the time in calamity certain you can get your vessel force appearance is busy. " I hesitate not land such reply. He smiles , a silk does not be easy detect proud explanation he has sensed me another layer meaning.
I can not when along the intention expression that he guides self , such person and me do not appreciate , at least he is one likes drama disposition Xu person, or he is a sincere person. Really, there is such a kind of man: Woman sees that he is man, scholar sees that he is military husband, businessman sees that he is competitor, officialdom sees that he is scholar. But I see him, in his bone son, it is supercilious as ordinary person does not untie and is lonely, even man and appearance packed very usually, talk about smile , flirt with woman.
I have my wine simply. Changing do in the past, perhaps, hint and the association of my meeting for opposite sex are filled with interest, since with Luo Si Yu that afterwards, I have gotten seemingly " like to be unable " , am for the ambiguous sight that I can realize with word, I a little hate bitterly. Ambiguity is the destiny of the crime of man! This is my only constant conclusion.
On wine table, two male, 5 women still have some girls that they bring , sunshine the same clear beautiful expression. Having wine have only relaxed irony and frolic. I sit when Liu is opposite, seems those women have long with him cooked Luo arrive to have no scruple , snatching one after another to suffer him is seated , have many star to hold the tendency of month. Friend makes fun of intentionally, in goodwill, mix with jealousy. I often carelessly the sight of Chu--Liu-Wei, this arouses a girl person discover. That girl expression wooden wood is not quite natural in smile. Liu immediately consciousness and discover , the girls of other activisms and beginnings flirt , for this, I feel that am ridiculous. When that friend introduces my scope of operations to all, he hears with full interest. Having heard expression to happen have the promise of investment intention, decide to let me go tomorrow his company's continuity discusses.
Originally at the time of being heavily in debt , it has tall and strong one and not very disagreeable peasant entrepreneur the assistant that lets me be him, and helping me return debt. Think of this, some of my shakes. Look at the expression in the eyes of children, I know what money are.
The next day, I have gone to his company , have talked about more than one hour , have no fruit. " your personal struggle is so bitter, pay out do not become proportion with profit. Go to our company! Our enterprise need to resemble the partner as you. " Liu Wei says. With my ability, I can make his enterprise famous. However, merely a little episode lets me have refused him appearance help. He says suddenly for me: " I love you! "
Having heard this words my point does not feel embarrassed. I smile land say that thanks , professionalness polite formula. In one hour, he has called four telephone to me,since he walks out of his company. In telephone, exchange business detail constantly with me, but I feel to have ulterior motives.
Return to home, it is tired to feel some, lie on bed , remember my debt of 2000 thousand. Right now, I constantly Yi Yin with him together scene, direct to let self enter state. . . . . I have nearly persuaded self.
In second day, together with Liu Wei, go to relevant department to handle affairs , I talk volubly make want the matter managed everything is smooth. In the evening, he asks me to have meal , I want to go home early. Not because for him, detesting , it is to miss child very much. Normally, have nearly not let for child to do the responsibility of mother. When he sends me go home on the road, looking at him the profile that drives , I have again thought of money. Right now, it is blurred that I nearly have. When he is careful carefully handle the time of puting on my shoulder, I have not refused that heart even has a kind of encouragement sense. Have not thought that he pats my shoulder only , says: " trunk Ma let self so bitter? Woman should first know appreciation, can so just let man come to appreciate her by oneself. " the words of him have cultural words very much. He the hand withdrawal of his goes to steering wheel. I smile as before, gently, in the brain, smile some for self are dimly. I this is smiling? The smile of ancient appearance woman sneers, mother! It is still the shadow in spring palace picture.
Liu Wei sends me at domestic entrance , does not have any movement, respect has to add , one pays beautiful angry and graceful appearance. Thought a night, in second day, I have refused still and his cooperation. I am not noble; And not is clean body since is good; Also not conservative loyal virtue.
Is in afterwards that hard time , I always regret for him refusal. It can persuade my self if relapse thought seemingly has only a answer. I do not like him! And the reason that not liked is only: He the process of having no land have said at the beginning ," I love you" this 3 words. This 3 words should be said by the opposite side who I say first and help for wanting to get eagerly. Program has been wrong , I can not accept. Because I do not believe feelings, doubt feelings throughout is true. Actually, being not as good as him to come up say: I want you! If so, I think that we are won by pair. Unfortunately.
However, give help originally for Luo Si Yu accept , complete is another return son matter. I will not forget forever, in that day, I seek him , at the time that he takes the money of 50 thousand Yuan , he looks at me , has touched my hand under one with hand , says: " is cold? In " that pity let me to be moved really. Though afterwards, I make up mind to leave him still , am only because he lets me can not bear with the ambiguity of other girls in network world, or say me Yi think of envy. As having had the mood of such a kind of cruelness to exist , I think that I will not accept any help of a man again, unless is genuine business complementary and needs. I believe own ability. Have been different from yesterday moreover today.
39th Zhang Luo
Speak:
" Si Yu has an accident
" why? You why not son says?
" in your Tianjin, he has hit person
Have I loosened one breath , fear that he is ill or is other , have hit person? Can he also hit person? I say soberly: " you tell me detailed condition , does that branch office manage? Rest assured that I will go to think of method with great efforts. "
He comes to Tianjin, how
The team leader of criminal police of Tianjin river west branch office is my university classmate , is named poplar to become. Call to him, one is asked. Details of the case is clear. Matter is so: When a dining room, also is we have frequently go to that dining room, one of his person has wine. It is many to drink , have pounded household dining room , have still met a pregnant woman carelessly, the husband of opposite side does not sell Zhang, move hand, as a result, both sides have wound. The right cheek of opposite side has sewn 5 needles, his finger and arm big scope cut and condition of the injury are not heavy , but person wants quilt punishment Ju.
" get , this how to get torture really
" grandmother! Face is
" he why can hit person?
" result follows identity relevant
" lover relation,
" Ha, do you grow
" will soon
" slow! You take away me straightforwardly.
" can not let my
" white runs is also not your a person, still
" he has no other friends
" family members seek Bai! At
" is good, say conclusion.
" have to close 7 days
I have understood. Say goodbye
Ran after Ning have received telephone say:
When I according to that telephone< chmetcnv w:st=on unitname=绫?sourcevalue=1 hasspace=False negative=False numbertype=3 tcsc=1>It< chmetcnv/>Are you far
" you? " I look
He nods gently , then says: " I am his classmate
" can only seems
" I want to go to see him, hold person to
I have not spoken
Liu Wei has gone , I have not sought with him
Along sea river, one of my person has
40th Zhang
Speak: Alexander
Already late at night at twelve o'clock son , Sun Li has not gone home yet, does mobile phone also do not receive , have made what matter? I am so urgent that can't help walking about continually in room. I never like to remember the telephone of what person, company already have long nobody. Does she do what? Where do you seek her? She why do not hit telephone explanation to me , I think carelessly.
Marry for decade , this is still first. Not! She has what matter surely, hide me, I always doubt her to have no time feelings do not tell me. I a time of another call everywhere, receive or having no person.
Up to midnight
" have made what matter? It is dear. " see
" is all right son, a little while, I say with you. " one of her face goes tired outly into room to change clothes, I have poured a cup of tea at once to put on table , say if she does not want today that I will not inquire what. I say: " you rest first! "
She thanks have seen
Have passed half hour probably, she pushes door to come in , sees that I have not slept yet , say softly: " Sa Sha, sorry! The trouble that has company's past business must be handled , is about some problems of debt, these matters are very for a long time former, I have not said with you , have handled today. Hai! I can say in detail with you too repeated afterwards, may? "
" is natural. You have not had an accident
Return to room, I always sleep not , feel always that Sun Li has not spoken real speech completely for me. Certainly for these years, one of her person supports home and company and does not be easy , what matter wants her make the brain. She will face various matters, I am foreigner after all, when a lot of matters of China not very know still, it is busy that my real gang does not go up her what. My heart is compromised very much with worry. I think , if be possible, I advise her to accompany me to go to Russia , live there, I can raise home and child.
In second day, have not waited
She says: " not! I do not leave China , leave if thinking , in those years, I stay in Australia , am also the same today, no matter survival has , does not be easy so, I must realize own dream. Can you understand the words of me? "
" however
" if which one day I departure China, I think that I can cover tightly to die. I excellence lies in Chinese land, though now, having not embodied yet, it is magnificent that the literature that includes me sinks yet. " she says , it is tenacious that vision is filled with.
" I understanding,
" calmness is the calmness
I say that however,
Then, she has spoken former condition to me, including knowing the debt at the beginning of me that business fault forms. She says: " this is the fault of my individual, can not let you follow me to lose , so in these years, I have not told you. "
" my but your husband
She has cried
I really regret very much, this decade I though live frequently in China, may not very much know China still still , also do not understand the heart of Chinese completely. However, from Sun Li, I have seen that a Chinese's is kind. Even if she has deceived me, is also goodwill, I think.
Article
< chsdate w:st=on year=2007 month=6 day=30 islunardate=False isrocdate=False>2007-06-30< chsdate/>In morning
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